Snooki, a baby bump and two big dudes...

Snooki was photographed not hiding her baby bump for once. Can you imagine how enormous her boobs will be? Snooki is going to get huge and hopefully she doesn't tip over when she's rendered helpless by that fetus that will most likely be about half the size of Snooki when it finally pops out. Poor Snooks, she is going to look like an Oompa Loompa that swallowed Augustus Gloop.

Rihanna chews and swallows, doesn't spit...

Rihanna tweeted this photo of herself scarfing down some McDonalds fries and then a picture showing us "all gone" just like a good toddler or maybe a mental patient showing the nurse that those meds made it down the hatch. In Rihanna's case it was probably some ecstasy and she'll insist that everyone call her "Molly" for the rest of the night.

Kat Von D's Haunted House

Kat Von D is not one of my favorite people. I find her to be a product of reality TV and a mediocre tattoo artist at best. However, I follow her on Twitter. I follow a lot of celebrities on Twitter for no apparent reason. Anyway, Kat tweeted this photo of her old house that burned down last year. I've seen it and it was quite spectacular. A freaking castle practically. Anyway, in this tweet she said she missed her old house and that it was haunted. The she posted this picture of a weird, ghostly looking person in the window. I totally see it. I don't know... it looks pretty clear, it could be a reflection like in the other window or it could even be the housekeeper peeking out to see if she's about to get caught raiding Kat's closet. Not that anybody in their right mind would want to do that.

John Mayer thinks he's Johnny Depp

John Mayer seemed to have fallen off the face of the earth until now. He was photographed looking very familiar and a whole lot like Johnny Depp. The outfit is nearly identical! The brown jacket, jean shirt, grey t-shirt and blue jeans. Even the hat is similar except for the band. John Mayer is such a dweeb he probably googled Johnny and copied his look. Sort of how John's ex girlfriend Jennifer Love Hewitt stole Kim Kardashian's bandage dress trick.

Jessica Simpson is lie telling....

Jessica Simpson says she has gained 40 pounds during this pregnancy. NO WAY! More like 70 pounds. The "average" pregnant woman gains 30 to 40 pounds. I do believe that Jess was speaking only for her breasts because they look like they could tip the scales at 20 pounds each. I think Jessica saw this pregnancy as a license to eat and eat she has. It's all good because she will drop that weight within a year doing it the "right" way. She'll get paid major cash to appear in all the tabloids with "before and after" photos and an article filled with her secret diet tips. Whatever.

Octomom Nadya Suleman is naked for cash...

Octomom Nadya Suleman has finally done it... posed nude for a magazine. Not for us here in the United States but for a European magazine. Like we aren't going to get out hands on the pictures? I heard she made about $10,000 for getting naked. Totally not worth it if you ask me. She could have held out for Playboy for a hundred grand.. Maybe Hef didn't want her, I dunno. I know people are going to look at her naked photos just like we all ogled her bikini pictures last year. These photos are rather tame and I believe the take on the photos and story was how Nadya got her figure back after birthin' so many babies. It's easy really... start out relatively fit then have a doctor do a tummy tuck. Nothing difficult or amazing about that.

I sort of feel for Nadya. She is a certain type of crazy that is close to my heart. I've watched countless interviews of hers and she really tries to reel it in after each one. Those first interviews she was a maniac. That laugh, the constant interruptions, talking over the interviewer. I believe her mind runs a mile a minute and she can't stop it. She has worked on herself although she swears she never watches herself in interviews I don't believe it. Either she watches or reads about it because she has toned it down quite a bit.

I really believe that Octo had her sights on a Kate Plus 8 type of deal but once people found out about all of the other kids and that she wasn't married they sort of turned on her. No free diapers for the Suleman kids. It's a shame really. At least she is trying and I believe her when she says she has never been on welfare other than WIC. The thing I don't agree with is her irrational need to keep those kids in private schools. That costs her a fortune and frankly, I understand her rationale but she simply can't afford it. I would think food and shelter would be number one on her list.

Anyway, here is Nadya Suleman, naked. Sort of. Enjoy.

Katie Holmes gets a workout...

Katie Holmes was once again photographed carrying Suri. Does Suri have a bratty expression on her face or is she just going through an awkward phase?  I understand the paparazzi rush up on celebrities and they arejust  looking out for their kids but it seems like Suri is the only kid that gets carted around at her age. She is fully old enough to walk on her own. If she is too tired and bitchy to make it to the limo maybe Katie should leave her ass at home with the nanny for a change instead of keeping her out  all hours of the night.

Prince Charles and Camilla are uptight...

Here are a couple of photos of Prince Charles and Camilla eating ice cream. These two have to be the most uptight people on earth. I could never quite figure out what Charles saw in Camilla... of course we know exactly what Camilla saw in Charles. I guess that throws out the old saying that when a man cheats the mistress never wins. Charles ended up marrying Camilla after he divorced Princess Diana and she tragically died. I suppose they deserve each other and their stuffy ways. Diana said that "there were 3 in her marriage" ...I wonder how many are in this one?

Ashley Greene Upskirt Photo

Ashley Greene gave us a peek at her butt cheek as a gusty wind and a big hug from some dude made her flirty little skirt flip up. It's not much but a little ass is better than none.

Jessica Simpson bellys up to the trough...

Jessica Simpson went out in a torrential downpour to practice for when her amniotic fluid breaks. When Jessica's water finally breaks, I'm sure the world will be flooded for a week so just like Noah you better build your ark. Actually Jessica went out in a rainstorm to get herself some BBQ and I don't blame her... I'd walk through fire for some Taco Bell right about now.

Loose Lips Links

Kris Jenner has really bad advice for Khloe & Lamar Evil Beet

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Miley Cyrus is making a big mistake Celeb Teen Laundry

Rihanna likes to be naked. Shocker. Lickable Celebs

Kendra Wilkenson slapping dicks off The Great Monkey Suit

Jessica Alba is passive agressive...

Jessica Alba is a total bitch and she needs to get over herself. Here she is giving us the old sunglasses middle finger adjustment as if we don't get it already. Jessica sucks as an actress, married some dude and had a kid or two and still gets her photo taken. After all of the crap she has "starred" in she should be happy that anyone even bothers to photograph her these days. This is what she signed up for, it's not like she is an amazing actress that wants to be taken seriously. Really? Have you watched The Love Guru?

Miley Cyrus looks weird...

Miley Cyrus was photographed looking really weird and sort of like a circus freak if you ask me. Hair pulled into a tight bun and a tiny waist with huge hipbones. I can see her photo as a painting on a tent at a fair which probably isn't too far from the truth these days.

Ashely Tisdale has a nice ass photo...

A lot of people hate on Ashley Tisdale. I don't get it. Maybe it's because she was a former snore-er that got her nose fixed or maybe it's because she doesn't have any real talent to speak of. However, she does have a pretty nice ass that she shared with us on Twitter.

Kim Kardashian is slumming....

Kim Kardashian was photographed looking less than impeccable. The horror! You'd think Kim could afford a new pair of jeans although my guess is that these cost $500. Her best recent photo op was being pelted with a bag of flour. I love that look on her. Even better than the rice that was thrown at her fake ass wedding. Now we just need to get PETA on board to pelt her with some red paint for wearing all of those poor helpless dead animal skins that she likes so well.

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Hilary Duff finally popped Evil Beet

Suri Cruise is such a brat Celeb Baby Laundry

Rihanna & Ashton wtf? Swanky Celebs

Victoria Beckham kisses Beyonce's big ass Lickable Celebs

Jersey Shore's Deena is looking wonky The Great Monkey Suit

Coco shows us her wonky tit photo...

Coco is certainly not shy and her Twitter photos will prove that. However while out with husband Ice T,  Coco decided to make it real classy and flashed her boob to the photographers. Ice T doesn't seem to mind. I suspect he doesn't mind that tongue ring she is sporting either.  You can see the uncropped full photo after the jump.

Katie Holmes has her hands full...

It's been ages since I've posted a photo of Suri Cruise. The last time might have been when Suri grabbed a package of penis candy. I am glad to see that they finally took her bottle away. Mom, Katie Holmes is still carrying her though. Maybe Suri has a sprained ankle from those stilettos she has been wearing.

Selena Gomez eats... keeps it down.

Selena Gomez hit up the craft table on set for a quick lunch. Her expression is cute as she decides whether to load up on carbs or go vegan. Whatever it is that she is eating is doing her body good. Selena is hawt! Those shorts are not. I can't stand the pockets hanging out look.

Kate Moss can't get it together...

Kate Moss is always trying to make a fashion statement... if it's being bone thin or showing her scary long nipples, Kate is all over it. Here she is walking around with her belt unhooked and her pants unzipped. Either she is taking fashion to a new height or her high has taken her to new heights as it's possible that she rushed out of the bathroom stall after snorting a few quick lines off the toilet seat and simply forgot to zip up.

Reese Witherspoon is knocked up...

Reese Witherspoon and her new hubby Jim Toth are expecting a baby. This will be the third kid for Reese as she popped out two additional kids with ex husband Ryan Phillippe. Not much of a time waster, Ryan has  moved on after the divorce from Reese to a few young ladies. Very young ladies. It's kind of gross, but it makes me think.... if this new baby is a girl will Ryan try to date her in 20 years?

Leonardo DiCaprio likes them hard...

This photo of Leo DiCaprio and his mom explains a lot. It shows that he is a good son and spends quality time with his momma and it also explains why Leonardo likes those manly looking women.

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Michael Lohan is running off at the mouth, again Evil Beet

Jennie Garth needs a new baby daddy Celeb Baby Laundry

Lindsay Lohan doesn't ride for free Lickable Celebs

Rihanna wants to play dress up Swanky Celebs

Demi Moore has photoshop to thank The Great Monkey Suit

Gwyneth Paltrow gets slayed by The Dirty Disher

Beth Chapman Plastic Surgery Nightmare...

When I saw the first photo of Beth Chapman, Dog The Bounty Hunter's wife, I noticed her massive boobs. I think that's pretty much what everyone sees when they look at her. I wonder if those suckers are real? Then I caught a glimpse of her belly button and thought, that doesn't look right. It has that telltale narrow stretch of a tummy tuck. I scanned through the rest of the photos and in the second shot you can clearly see a huge tummy tuck scar. It looks like she had the procedure done in a closet somewhere in Mexico. It's bad! That scar is not from a c-section, I've had 2 and it's way low and barely noticeable. That big, gaping slice is from removing skin and fat from her midsection and most mommy celebrities have had it done. The difference is that you can't see the scar on most celebs as they have the resources to get it done properly. I thought Dog and Beth were loaded with cash so why the botched job? Anyway, here is Beth and Dog on vacay, looks like Dog is on his way to skin cancer with that fried face... it's almost as damaged as his hair and that is saying a lot.

Jessica Lowndes almost upskirt photo....

Jessica Lowndes had a near upskirt photo thanks to a sudden gust of wind. I've never noticed Jessica before, maybe because I don't watch the new 90210. I watched the old version obsessively. To the point of not answering my phone when the show was on. Back then we all didn't have cell phones, so the landline would ring, the answering machine would pick up and my friends would taunt me over the show. "You're not answering because you are fascinated by Shannon Doherty's crooked eye..." Which was true. I was fascinated with her eyes and also with Tori Spelling's huge tit pit in the center of her implants. Ah, those were the days. Anyway, here is Jessica Lowndes almost showing us her panties, but honestly, I just love her dress.

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Lindsay Lohan puts herself on house arrest Evil Beet

Jessica Simpson's baby shower bash Celeb Baby Laundry

Simon Cowell had feathered hair photo Celeb Teen Laundry

Kim Kardashian bootcamp booty Swanky Celebs

Meghan McCain doesn't go "there" The Great Monkey Suit

Vanessa Hudgens cannot be serious...

Here is a photo of Vanessa Hudgens as you've never seen her before. I have no idea what is going on with this picture. Maybe it's for a role? I should know this and I would if I had researched it. Google is not my friend today so you'll have to settle for this disturbing Vanessa Hudgens photo.

Miley Cyrus brought out her boobs...

Miley Cyrus cleans up real nice now don't she? Miley is all grown up and she is starting to grow on me. She has left her awkward phase and she really is a pretty girl. Other than the weed smoking, Miley seems to be doing alright. Really, I think she had a decent upbringing, unlike me, who still sucks at grammar.And spelling. And punctuation.

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MTV WTF? Evil Beet

Nick Lachey's penis works good Celeb Baby Laundry

Willow Whips no more Swanky Celebs

Paris Hilton looks rich and famous The Great Monkey Suit

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Russell Brand is a wanted man Evil Beet

Charlize Theorn adopted a kid all of a sudden Celeb Baby Laundry

John Travolta paid a hooker? I thought he was gay Lickable Celebs

The Kardashians are sort of naked The Great Monkey Suit

Rihanna may as well be topless...

You have to wonder what Rihanna was thinking when she wore this mesh shirt with a too small sweat shirt over the top. I know what she was thinking... "Maybe if I flash my titties, everyone will stop thinking about how stupid I am to have gone back to Chris Brown." Diversionary tactic or not Rihanna is pathetic and her tits are simply mediocre.

Jessica Simpson is about to blow!

This poor girl needs to have that baby. Jessica Simpson has to be really miserable right about now. This is what a normal pregant woman looks like. Beyonce should have taken notes. Poor Jess. It'll all be over soon, you'll have your adorable, REAL baby,  go on Weight Watchers and film another reality show. I like Jessica. I can hear her thinking, ..."is this a baby I have in my uterus or am I just a whale?"

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So, you'd think Taylor Swift could afford a cheeseburger Evil Beet

Jennifer Garner bounces back Celeb Baby Laundry

John Travolta just being himself The Great Monkey Suit

Leann Rimes can't figure it out either...

Leann Rimes was photographed checking out her boobs. I am calling them "her" boobs because I'm sure they are paid for and not just a balance due on a credit card. She is studying them rather intently and I can only guess as to what is going through her bubble brain. She cannot be thinking, "wow, my tits look great" because she would be lying to herself, which I'm sure she does every time she tells the story of how she and Eddie got together to his poor kids. My guess is that she is wondering why those titties are trying to quit her and are headed off in two different directions. I know why... they are splitting up to run because they might have a better chance of getting away.

Loose Lips Links...

Snooki has a bad case of the sads Evil Beet

Heidi Klum is playing the mommy card these days Celeb Baby Laundry

Katie Price is usually naked Lickable Celebs

Kristin Davis is terrified Swanky Celebs

Miley Cyrus walks the dog The Great Monkey Suit

Kelly Clarkson sure has changed...

Here is an old photo of Kelly Clarkson and a more recent one. I do not remember her being that thin so maybe it only lasted about a minute. I do remember her being a pudgy girl on American Idol. We've all noticed she's packed on a few pounds but what a difference! They say most of American woman are closer to looking like Kelly's "after" photo than her "before" picture. Wouldn't it be nice if celebrities could just be who they are without all of the pressure to be thin? Does it really matter? Not sayin' all the ladies should end up like Rosie O'Donnell but if they want to eat a cheeseburger and not puke it back up they should be able to.

Vanessa Hudgens has a big blonde camel toe...

Vanessa Hudgens is sporting blonde hair and a massive camel toe. Well, to be fair it isn't exactly a camel toe as it is not split up the middle but it would if it could.

Kate Upton Shark Attack Photo...

Kate Upton managed to pull her ravaged butt out of the water and pose for this photo right after being attacked by a shark that was hell bent on chewing those shorts right off of her ass.

Jessica Simpson would like to thank the Airbrush Gods...

Everyone has posted this Elle photo of Jessica Simpson in all of her pregnant glory. Of course she looks amazing but we all know that ain't the whole truth. Granted Jessica looks as lovely pregnant as when she is not but I see a whole lot of airbrush and photo shop going on here. If you have seen Jess lately, you will not be fooled by these skinny arms and only one chin. The rest of her ass has been swallowed up by a shadow and those thighs have been thinned. The biggest downsize though, are her boobs. Poor Chestica's tits are massive these days and no way am I buying this photo. Really, I don't give two shits either way for this picture. This pregnant pose has been done a million times.

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Britney Spears morphs and it has some scary parts Evil Beet

Sienna Miller doesn't want to discuss it Celeb Baby Laundry

Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson is a real character Teen Laundry

A little something for the ladies: William Levy The Great Monkey Suit

Selena Gomez Butt Cheeks and Blood Test...

Here is Selena Gomez leaving a Quest Diagonstics clinic and climbing the stairs of some trailer where she is filming some crap that I'm sure she will be amazing in. Looks like she had a little blood drawn which could be from having unprotected sex with Justin Bieber now that he is 18 and can have sex the legal way, not having to worry about getting Selena pregnant and being arrested for statutory rape but you can't rape the willing and my guess is that Justin is ready and willing to tap that ass on the daily which explains Selena's butt cheeks hanging out of her shorts. She is dragging ass from all that shagging.

Katy Perry is a cheeky little monkey...

Katy Perry is back in the spot light after her predictably failed marriage to Russell Brand fell apart. Of course Katy has never been a wallflower so she is sporting blue hair and showing off her butt cheeks in a see through dress. I'm sure Katy had every intention no idea her ass was hanging out for these photos. Butt here it is. Katy Perry and her ass cheeks. Enjoy.